Thursday, June 09, 2005

老神在在的單身理由

以下是網路上來路不明的道聽塗說, 不完全代表鄧鄧立場

英國調查指出,到公元 2000年,獨自生活的人數已從120萬增加到800萬除此之外,單身者喜歡花花草草等園藝植物,且花比較多的時間閱讀

同一報告也分析了單身貴族喜歡獨自生活的原因:

1. 盥洗室永遠淨空
2. 看電視時能任意而為,包括剪腳指甲
3. 電話完全屬於自己
4. 一個月洗一次衣服也沒有人囉唆
5. 隨時能赤條條的到處走
6. 冰箱裡的食物不會不翼而飛
7. 正在念的書沒有人會碰
8. 不會有人忘記帶鑰匙在凌晨兩點要你起床開門
9. 音樂放大聲也沒人管
10.不必假裝喜歡另一半的朋友
11.打碎任何東西都不必內疚
12.可以完全掌握電視遙控器
13.披頭散髮面貌狼狽不會有人目睹
14.吃東西時不必管時間
15.家裡任何東西如剪刀、錄音帶等不怕找不到

單身的好處

1. 可以隨心所欲出去,不必編理由
2. 想吃什麼就吃什麼
3. 自己安排生活作息, 睡不睡覺用不著解釋
4. 衣櫥比較寬敞
5. 不用等洗手間
6. 可以盡興地任自己一團混亂

話說我今天下班後一個人衝去吃挫冰
小姐問我幾個人,我用手很酷的比了個"一"

她張大了眼,提高十分貝說: "妳一個人喔?" 於是我很鎮定的跟她說: "我只是來吃冰的"

接著她指示--那妳去坐角落

是怎樣...

6 Comments:

Blogger danio said...

你真的一個人去吃冰?

你竟然喜歡吃那會讓我拉肚子的冰 O_O

1:18 PM  
Anonymous 假單身(*m*)一天到晚裝單身 said...

這道聽塗說的還真是對。
21點裡面我點了23下頭(2下附贈的...真是太對了)q(^+++^)p

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